Week 484: The Meeting

Weekly Written Review 

I started this week out on the west coast and I ended it on the east coast. It began with a project to-do list and ended with a few personal endeavors. After Christmas, I reconnected with someone I haven't seen in almost 10-years. Upon reuniting, one of the first things we did was open an old Chancellors shoebox entitled, The Summer of Judgement 98'. That box is among many boxes I've stored away from pre-high school, high school and post-high school. This particular box is burgundy with gray ducktape wrapped around the perimeter. Much of the adhesive was still sticking. Within are letters from the most painful summer of my life. That summer I separated from my first girlfriend. I waited until my senior year to acquire her. We met the summer of 97' in a summer school keyboard class. She became the talk of the town on the first day of school. I was a relatively popular guy so it was a big deal when people found out that I had a girlfriend. My friends were accustomed to me being single. As a result, she received a lot of attention for being my first girl.

Our relationship wasn't typical. It was restricted. Her father was very strict. We never talked on the phone nor did we engage in anything frisky. I did my best by walking her to class, taking her to Homecoming and Prom. She was the absolute definition of an innocent conservative girl. I was the absolute definition of a respectful gentleman. We were virgins and I never questioned her desire to wait until marriage. Believe it or not, the idea of waiting for her until marriage was exciting to me. Saying that I liked this girl would be an absolute understatement.

We weren't doing all the things other teenagers were doing and I was okay with that. Honestly, I didn't want to do any of those things. I was happy investing in her knowing that things will one day get better. Then came the Summer of Judgement and her request for space. That request trigged an extremist gene in me which has been growing strong ever since. In response, I recommended the entire summer and set a date for her to call me (Judgement Day) if she wanted us to be together. Behold, this is how the Summer of Judgement came to fruition.

During our meeting this week, she read out loud my pencil and pen written letters and it was a bit painful to reexperience. It was painful to hear the words of my teenage self who loved a girl that didn't love him back the same way. Revisiting this experience makes me question if she even liked me at all. That summer was really hard. There were days I couldn't eat because I lost my appetite. I use to ask our mutual friends, "Did she talk about me?" The answer was always, "no." I wrote a song, dedicated it to her for her, recorded it on tape, then had my cousin drop it off at her job. In the letters, I wrote about someone telling me that she said I couldn't sing. I probably experienced my first bout with depression that summer.

Resurrecting those memories collided with a lot of external thoughts. I was okay with our relationship being restricted in high school but those letters made me realized she robbed me/us from a chance at a normal relationship. She never invited me to her homecoming, prom... as a matter of fact, she never invited me to anything. She never called on Judgement day, yet she tormented me with games from time to time. Somehow we ended up at the same college, igniting some form of hope but that was also a fluke.

I can go on forever about our past but nostalgia is way too painful. I will admit, these painfull experiences made me stronger. As a matter of fact, the summer of 98 is when I began discovering my creative superpowers. Much of my uncanny abilities are connected to the pain she put me through. Without her, I made important life decisions that are vividly connected to my current state of greatness. During that pathetic summer, I wrote and recorded my first album and I set for on a mission to relocate to Tallahassee to attend Florida A&M University. If she stayed in my life I probably wouldn't have my current backlog of achievements. I probably would've lived my life worshiping hers. Although I benefited a lot from her absence, a part of me still rather the Summer of Judgement never ever existed.


Sunday, December 22, 2019

* Dinner with Patrick...


Monday, December 23, 2019

* Finished editing RAD


Tuesday, December 24, 2019

* Sent off RAD to my contact for consideration

* Flight to Tampa. I thought I was going to miss my flight but the TSA screening went magically fast. I arrived and they pointed me to a reverse area. I had no idea where I was going? Turns out there's a check-in area in the back. Only two people were in front of me. It was pretty much smooth sailing after that.


Wednesday, December 25, 2019

* Christmas day. Relaxed day and laid back. My mom made a lot of food but it was the first time not eating a dinner table with family. It's cool with me.


Thursday, December 26, 2019

* The Meeting part 1. Opening The Summer of 98 Box.


Friday, December 27, 2019

* The Meeting part 2

* High school photo album reaction video

* A first roti experience for...


Saturday, December 28, 2019

* Dental office with MaTown

* Haitian mental health event


As the quest continues...

The future of Late Night

Motown Maurice